Will Rogers died in 1935. I sure wish he was around today so that he could make some more observations. He would have a field day. But then, what he saw then was not too different from what he would see now. Only now it's a lot worse. Well, here are a few of his amusing quotes from my daughter's lit book. I'll probably be coming from time to time with other nuggets from either her literature or history books. Thank God, ABeka is still teaching solid American History and may I say, teaching it quite well. They also do a great job of giving the students thoughts from the hearts and minds of many of the great Americans (of all races) who made this country unlike any other.
Now a few chuckles from Will. That is, if you're still able to laugh about these things. Which quote is your favorite?
- I am going to Washington as a delegation of one from the American Comedians' Association to get us some aid. No industry has been hit worse than us professional humorists. There is just too much unconscious amateur talent among our elected officials.
Say, can't you just see a Cabinet meeting? The secretary of war reports: "Sir, wars--none; peace--none; average: 50 percent." The postmaster general reports: "Sir, so many letters sent, so many letters received, so many letters lost."; The secretary of agriculture reports: "Sir, farms in the U.S.--eleven million; farms mortgaged--eleven million; farms carrying second mortgages--10,998,634. The department reports progress." The secretary of labor reports: "Sir, number of people laboring--ten million; people living off people laboring--ninety eight million, including twenty-three million government employees."
If you want to know when a war might be coming, you just watch the U.S. and see when it starts cutting down on its defenses. It's the surest barometer in the world.
Well, I'll tell you, the country is doing fine, if we can just keep some prominent man from getting up and crab it by saying: "We have reached the bottom."
A fool that knows he is a fool, is one that knows he don't know all about anything. But the fool that don't know he is a fool, is the one that thinks he knows all about anything.
- I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.